12/14/2015

Goal Setting For The Pessimist Part One


I'm one of those people who happen to be really good at making lists, like really good. My lists are always on fresh pieces of paper and carefully underlined in pretty pens in assorted candy colours.  Does this help me to follow through my list though.......erm no..

When ever I think about goals, I start positively writing a long long  long lists of goals I would like to achieve, goals that are attainable,  not silly random goals that wouldn't happen in a millions years.  I'm quite aware that  being the next British Prime Minister ain't gonna happen no matter how much positive thinking I drum up!! I always write goals that are important to me and then I write a deadline. 

But, despite writing very clear attainable goals, I never seem to achieve them, I always just push them along to *achieve*  for the following month and then the month after that. I don't actually make changes and the goals I have now are pretty much the ones I've been writing for the past ten years, the only thing that's changed is that I'm ten years older (but not wiser!)

Am I alone in this? How many of you, are still writing down the same goals year in, year out?
Please tell me I'm not alone in this!!

Why do I do this? I have no idea, I guess it's the resistance of change, perhaps I'm fearful of change and the un known, if I start to do things differently. What will happen??

Well, 2016, I have decided is going to be the year, I finally do ALL the goals I've been wanting to do. No excuses.  I am a pessimist, Perhaps part of me  feels I don't deserve nice things to happen to me so I keep playing the victim. Maybe I don't believe things will change so I think well what's the point.

BUT then I notice that all around me  my friends, are either married or getting married, have had kids moved out of London, bought a home etc and I feel like Jed from the Peep Show! Or a hamster on a wheel not going anywhere (for non UK residents!)

I've bought so many Self Help books in the past, so many I could actually open my own Self  Help Store but  once I've looked through them...I've just let them gather dust. Well a  couple of months ago I was reading a magazine  and one of their articles struck a chord with me.

I realised that my goals. (not very original  I should insert here!) i.e  Lose a stone,  Write a chick lit book. These goals focused on the end result and not the process itself. I needed to focus on the process that will help me towards my goal. Today I am going to write 500 words on my new book. Today I am going to go to the gym. Be concentrating on the little baby steps along the way, then I am more likely to reach my end goal. It's that simple but focusing on your goals everyday can be well sometimes boring, time consuming and SLOW!

You can't always control certain situations for instance, if you say on a Monday by Friday you will have a new job, Friday come around. What if you don't have this amazing new job you promised yourself. Chances are you'll feel pretty fed up over the weekend. However if you say on a Monday, everyday I will email my CV. to one company a day, you will feel more positive that you are taking action steps towards your goals. 

Sorry this piece was quite long so I broke in down into two parts.

Jessica.

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